Sunday, June 12, 2005
Support our troops
Of all the foolish things I’ve done, last week’s tops the list.
I’m almost embarrassed to publish this blog, but the story is so damn entertaining –I can’t resist.
Last Sunday, after getting a drunken phone call from New York friends, I was inspired to go out alone (red flag number one). So I go to Roscoe’s and meet a bunch of fellow Asians. . . we dance and drink the night away and I have a great time.
It was then 11:30pm and I needed to go home. I begin to stumble over to the 7-11 for some Gatorade, cheese and crackers to pre-empt my hangover. While crossing the street this rather pathetic -- but good-looking -- guy spots me.
Now anyone, even I, SHOULD have simply directed him to the loop and on his marry way. No not me.
Do you see where this is going? Yes, I was influenced by his looks, but I also didn’t get too bad a read and he *seemed* genuinely abandoned.
So he comes to my house and uses the phone and is unable to retrieve his friend’s number, who lives in the suburbs. So I, rather reluctantly, offer for him to crash at my apartments.
Yes, some day you are going to find me in a dumpster some day. But the guy was military and visiting from Hawaii -- his ID checked out. Apparently, he was here for a conference but managed to squeeze in a trip to Chicago on the way.
The rest of that night, let’s just say, is something gentlemen don’t talk about.
So the following morning he was able to get a hold of his friend, exchange our information, and make it to the airport in time for his convention in St. Louis.
That day I get a call from him.
And that, as they say, is that.
I picked him up at the airport on Friday morning. He arrived in his uniform. Dear God, what am I getting myself into?
We take the el to where I work; he tells me he wants to take a picture of us together while he still has his uniform on.
Okay, weird, but fine. What the hell?
We take the photo opp and he’s off in a cab to my apartment.
Later that day I came home. He greets me enthusiastically at the door.
He actually went to Crate and Barrel and bought me a basting pan, oven mitts, a basting brush, and some other kitchen stuff that, apparently, he felt I shouldn’t be without. In total, I would say that this guy spent hundreds of dollars on this stuff that day.
The rest of the weekend was more of the same excessive behavior so that by Sunday, I was totally relieved to have some time to myself.
Note to self: No more picking up people off the streets.
(Though, in some strange way, it was sorta fun –Livin’ on the edge – and it was nice to have someone obsess over me for a couple of days.)
I’m almost embarrassed to publish this blog, but the story is so damn entertaining –I can’t resist.
Last Sunday, after getting a drunken phone call from New York friends, I was inspired to go out alone (red flag number one). So I go to Roscoe’s and meet a bunch of fellow Asians. . . we dance and drink the night away and I have a great time.
It was then 11:30pm and I needed to go home. I begin to stumble over to the 7-11 for some Gatorade, cheese and crackers to pre-empt my hangover. While crossing the street this rather pathetic -- but good-looking -- guy spots me.
Hey, man, do you know where I can find a hotel room around here. I’m visiting
from out of town and have lost my friends --I don’t have my cell phone on me.
Now anyone, even I, SHOULD have simply directed him to the loop and on his marry way. No not me.
Do you need to use a phone? If you need to make a call, you’re welcome to use
mine – my apartment is only a block from here.
Do you see where this is going? Yes, I was influenced by his looks, but I also didn’t get too bad a read and he *seemed* genuinely abandoned.
So he comes to my house and uses the phone and is unable to retrieve his friend’s number, who lives in the suburbs. So I, rather reluctantly, offer for him to crash at my apartments.
Yes, some day you are going to find me in a dumpster some day. But the guy was military and visiting from Hawaii -- his ID checked out. Apparently, he was here for a conference but managed to squeeze in a trip to Chicago on the way.
The rest of that night, let’s just say, is something gentlemen don’t talk about.
So the following morning he was able to get a hold of his friend, exchange our information, and make it to the airport in time for his convention in St. Louis.
That day I get a call from him.
Hey, I really think you’re a cool guy and was thinking . . . (God help thePerhaps it was desperation; perhaps I really thought I liked him; perhaps it is summer and have some sort of summer fever. I answered “Cool –and you’re welcome to stay with me.”
military guy who starts thinking) . . I can change my ticket so we can spend
some additional time this weekend together. Hadaka say?
And that, as they say, is that.
I picked him up at the airport on Friday morning. He arrived in his uniform. Dear God, what am I getting myself into?
We take the el to where I work; he tells me he wants to take a picture of us together while he still has his uniform on.
Okay, weird, but fine. What the hell?
We take the photo opp and he’s off in a cab to my apartment.
Later that day I came home. He greets me enthusiastically at the door.
Welcome home, Matt! I’ve been running all over the place today and want to showHe pulls out these enlarged (8x10) photos. Dear God, they are the ones we took earlier that day. Things are getting fucked up fast.
you something.
Hey, man, and I have something else for you too.Dear God, what else? He directs me into the bedroom where I find a large orchid plant, a card, and some chocolate-covered macadamia nuts. If I’d thought this was going overboard, I was in for more surprises.
He actually went to Crate and Barrel and bought me a basting pan, oven mitts, a basting brush, and some other kitchen stuff that, apparently, he felt I shouldn’t be without. In total, I would say that this guy spent hundreds of dollars on this stuff that day.
The rest of the weekend was more of the same excessive behavior so that by Sunday, I was totally relieved to have some time to myself.
Note to self: No more picking up people off the streets.
(Though, in some strange way, it was sorta fun –Livin’ on the edge – and it was nice to have someone obsess over me for a couple of days.)
# posted by otas : 10:22 AM
